1 post tagged “old men”

Sometimes I make single serving friends on the subway.  Especially when I don't want to.  Here are some fun friend conversations that I had today!

Part I: Getting on the S to Grand Central

I sit down.  Man comes in and turns around to directly where I sit.

MAN WITH BAD TEETH:  Is this seat taken?
ME: Looks around at empty car.  Uh, no, no one is sitting there.
MAN WITH BAD TEETH:  Sitting directly next to me in an empty car. Model huh?
ME: What?
MAN WITH BAD TEETH: You're a model, huh?
ME: No.

Man doesn't reply.  Spends a few awkward silent seconds before getting up from his seat and proceeding to the next car.  I guess he doesn't like single serving friends who aren't models.

Part II: Getting off the S to Grand Central

Older Man sitting across from me gestures 'ladies first' to go out the door.  The platform is on the other side of the train, so the Older Man gestures the same towards the other door.  As I walk out the door, the Older Man follows me at my side.

RUSSIAN MAN:  You speak Russian?
ME: Ueh, no.  I don't speak any Russian.
RUSSIAN MAN:  You Russian?
ME: Nope! Not Russian either.
RUSSIAN MAN:  Looks confused. You get that all the time I bet.  Uh, you Ukranian? Bulgarian?...
ME: I'm actually Chinese and Swedish.
RUSSIAN MAN: Oh.  You look like my friend from Russia.  She has, similar eyes as you.  She looks like you.  But she is not Chinese.  You look like you could be from Russia.
ME: Oh, thats interesting.  Parting ways.  Well, take care!
RUSSIAN MAN: Best wishes to you!  Oh, I wish you could work for us.  Do you have a job?
ME: Yes, I have a job.  I'm sorry
RUSSIAN MAN: I see, well good luck!

Note to self: Sometimes I may look like I speak Russian.