Amidst a casual conversation about relationships with Jared, he remarked that the way I spoke of an old beau reminded him of the omnipresent alien father figure in the late 80's television show Out of this World. For those of you who aren't familiar with the show, it starred a teenage girl named Evie who struggled with the throes of growing up half-alien. Her alien father Troy would only appear occasionally to deliver patriarchal advice, always concealed by the doorway and large pillows of space smoke.
Suddenly it became all too clear. An alien father who was too busy to make a physical appearance on the show? A single mother left with a half-alien child to care for on her own? A single clue to Troy's appearance as an outlined form back-lit by the light of the heavens? Sure one could mistakingly interpret Troy's true identity as Mr. God himself, but Jared and I agreed that Troy was actually Daft Punk. OF COURSE. Why didn't we think of this before?
Upon further investigation it turns out that Troy was actually voiced by Burt Reynolds. However I am positive this was merely a well plotted celebrity cover-up to hide the truth of Daft Punk's bastard child.
UPDATE:
Proof from the show's opening sequence, a screenshot of Daft Punk in its younger, more innocent days (with kisses)